The 10-Point Foolproof Guide to Becoming SBA President
This piece has been written by Anonymous from their notes from elections past. The doodle has been jointly done by Smriti Kalra (Batch of 2021) and Simran Kaur (National Institute of Design).
1. Become Class Representative. Not only will you be the Che Guevara of your peers, fighting against the autocratic administration, you’ll also master the art of securing project extensions, the most important, if not the only purpose you serve.
2. Second every cause on any and all mail threads. Bonus points for adding links that’ll superficially contribute to the discussion, and which no one will read anyway.
3. Don’t stop at seconding mail threads! Start some of your own. Let the people know you care. Whether they’re prepping for IAS or going for protests. No effort by any member of the student body will reach fruition without your invaluable contribution.
4. Don’t underestimate the value of forming meaningful bonds with your juniors. You don’t actually have to care about them – occasional texts checking in on how they’re doing, a few Chetta treats and the elusive promise of an actual treat will secure their vote in no time!
5. Be the local drug peddler of the NLS community. Indoctrinate young minds into a culture of substance abuse and be their guiding light on this journey. A ready stash of alcohol, cigarettes and weed will never hurt your cause (Only applicable for MHOR candidates).
6. Start early. If you aren’t a Convenor or a Joint Convenor of a committee, are you actually ready to be the leader of the masses? The answer is a resounding no.
7. Make your campaign do your dirty work, and then say “I can’t control what people are saying, but rest assured I’m not saying it.”
8. Accost random people at Chetta/ lib/ gym/ Kanchika/ KG/ breaks/ field/ wherever possible to give gyaan (aka subtly campaign).
9. Strategically pick certain juniors in certain batches to befriend, so as to enhance your social status and outreach in those batches.
10. And finally – deny all interest in the job even if you’ve wanted it since your first week of law school! The year you plan to stand, start discussing the need for academic reforms and coming closer together as a community.
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